Talk:Susla

{{#assessment:Creeperopolis|FA|Low}}

Worldbuilding Review (partial)

Lede

• Inaccuracy, Rakeo is not east of Susla.

• Fixed, was 0 iq

Etymology

• When did the name Susla appear?

• Timeframe specified.

• Why is the page “Susla” (or why has it become the predominant way to refer to the island in Jackian?)

• Reason given.

• Those non latin characters for kinwita don’t render for me.

• Template:Contains special characters added (aka, skill issue).

• “Some archeologists and historians” and “Other historians” could have balance problems, which side has more academic credibility if anyone?

• Credibility given (maybe)

Early human settlements

• Radiocarbon dating, not “radio carbon-dating”,

• Fixed.

• “have been disputed by some archeologists” who? Are they credible?

• changed to "have not been universally accepted by all archeologists" since going into who is redundant here

• There’s a double however in here.

• bruh. fixed

• “Some argue” Who? (I know that’s probably my problem/writing for that last bit).

• changed to "a minority of archeologists" since again going into "who" probably isnt important

• Oral transmission of history is still recording history, might be more accurate to describe them as not having written historical records instead. Otherwise all good.

• Fixed

Susla genocide

• This section looks fine.

Spode (talk) 21:12, 9 March 2024 (EST)

@MrSpode42: Repsonded. Creeper (talk) 04:13, 10 March 2024 (EDT)

March 15 2024 Page Review

Lede

• "The municipality of Susla consists of 32 islands, islets, and rocks" Should the rocks be mentioned here? I looked at some other pages on islands and they didn't refer to rocks.

• Removed

History

• "Little is known about the native Suslans who inhabited the island as they did not has written historical records outside of very few carved inscriptions" Replace "has" with "have", tense issue.

• 0 iq mistake, fixed

• "instead, living in an assortment of villages" comma here seems unneeded

• Removed

Government

• The table Largest settlements of Susla (as of 2020 census) has Mayor and Established categories mixed up

• Fixed

• Are those translations for 'southernmost stronghold' and 'fascist penal colony' needed? I think we've nixed those in the past

• In IRL Wikipedia, if it's coming from a direct untranslated quote in a different language, yes. MOS:FOREIGNQUOTE. We've been axing translations of random words, ie: "Susla is a viceroyalty (virreinato) of Creeperopolis. A viceroyalty is below the status of a department (departamento)." compared to here were its translating a direct quote.

• "military base compliments around 1,800 military personnel" maybe change this to "has a compliment of 1,800 military personnel". I'm not sure compliments works there.

• Changed to "has a garrison of 1,800 military personnel"

Other than that, this looks really good! Spode (talk) 00:45, 16 March 2024 (EDT)

@MrSpode42: Thanks, hope these have been addressed. Creeper (talk) 02:16, 16 March 2024 (EDT)

Լոս պայասոս իդիոտաս ծրեեն քփե սե ժամա "Քփինշիտա" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

¿Լոս Րակեանոս ծոն մփերտե ծերեբրալ րեալմենտե ծրեեն եստո? ՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱՋԱ 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 ¿¿¿¿¿ծօմո ես քփե եժոս սոն տան եստղպիդաս????? Լոս Ծրեեպերիանոս սոն ծլարամենտե սփպերիորես 💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎💪😎 — Preceding unsigned comment added by 129.55.38.240 (talk) 02:04, 17 March 2024 (EDT)

18 March 2024 Page Review

Infobox

• Infobox needs correction (Susla is not 100% ethnically Creeperian)

• Fixed

History

• Rivera Obregón appointed Luís Rivera Sánchez, his cousin, as interim viceroy, however, after Vázquez Luján and his soldiers disappeared and were not located by a search party, Rivera Obregón declared himself the captain general of San Juan (governor) confirmed Rivera Sánchez as his successor. There's two setences there that need a conjunctive like "and" to connect them, like "Rivera Obregón declared himself the captain general of San Juan (governor) and confirmed Rivera Sánchez as his successor".

• Fixed

• Following his rise to power in June 1833, Emperor Adolfo III, he sought to reward military officers loyal to his rule by promoting them to administrative positions across Creeperopolis This sentence looks gross to my lizard brain, and I think the reason why is the awkward ordering towards its beginning. There’s a clause with an unspecified male character, then an appositive clause that actually names him and his position, and then the rest of the sentence happens. I’d rephrase that as "Following Emperor Adolfo III’s June 1833 rise to power, he sought to reward loyal military officers by promoting them to administrative positions across Creeperopolis."

• Fixed

• Rubacalva Umaña was viceroy of Susla during the democratization of Creeperopolis and he opposed all efforts to democratize the country, but following an imperial decree by Emperor Maximiliano II in early December 1887 ordering the country's devolved governments to hold local elections for offices by the end of the year. …But what? Sentence fragment.

• Fixed

• Rubacalva Umaña did not seek elected as viceroy and announced his intention to retire from viceroyal administrationI think that’s supposed to say that they did not seek election for the position.

• Fixed

Geography

• In 1519, when the island fell under Senvarian control, the Creeperans released all of their domesticated pigs into the while to prevent the Senvarians from using them as food. I think that’s supposed to say “wild” rather than “while”.

• Fixed

Economy

• In 1796, the Punto Sur municipal government built a designated port for fishing vessels to resupply at and allowed fishing companies to construct facilities on the island to store fish and sell it to island residents, however, companies have to registered with the viceroyal government to fish in the island's territorial waters in order to utilize the port and build facilities Have to registered? Tense error. Could be fixed by adding “be”.

• Split the sentence since it's supposed to be present, added that be Creeper (talk) 20:16, 18 March 2024 (EDT)

With those corrections, I believe this page would be classified as a good article, based on our previous judging of articles. Spode (talk) 19:54, 18 March 2024 (EDT)

YO grilfriend stories are not able to seek 😑

thanks OCC copying distribution dissemination or other side 🤺 — Preceding unsigned comment added by 41.114.205.245 (talk) 19:03, 29 March 2024 (EDT)